Give me my detonators

So couple weeks ago, I got a postcard from my cable company in the mail, and instead of automatically throwing it in the trash, like I do, and every other person on the planet does, I looked at it. The package they were offering to "resident" was cheaper then what we're currently paying, so I figured "what the heck, I'll call and see if I can get a better deal." (Where we live there is actually competition for cable companies, which is a beautiful thing, since it means they can't automatically gouge you for HBO).

I'm on the phone with the cable woman, and she nicely explains, that, actually this package doesn't include this, that and the other, and the Internet speed is half what I currently have, so, no, I can't save any money.

But wait. I say. This packages says I'll get all these movie channels -- 10 different Showtimes and Cinemax and Starz.

You already get those, she says.

No, we don't, I say.

Yes, you do, she repeats. We upgraded you in January.

Allegedly they sent a postcard, but, as I stated, nobody ever looks at the postcards. And the channels are al up in the 300s past HBO, where no one even ever checks.

So anyway, last night, there's nothing on, and LawyerMan and I are flipping around, and I remember, "hey we have all these movie channels now! All right! Let's watch a flick"

And what did we watch? Die Hard.